Cracks In Sidewalks

She has played a repressed housewife, the wife of a car inventor, the wife of a President who is forced to leave office; the mother of a chess prodigy, Toby Maguire’s mother, a VP with a sex scandal, a CIA director, and an alcoholic single mother.  You might ask, what do each of these roles have in common?  Joan Allen, and Joan Allen, is always good.

She’s been one of those actresses that I have loved to watch over the years, subtle but strong defining her characters.   She seems to have made wise choices, or wise directors and writers have sought her out for the right roles.

Born in Rochelle, Illinois in 1956, Joan Allen was a very shy child who used acting as a means in which to draw her self out, having the freedom to express emotions and actions she could not otherwise express. And she excelled in doing so, so much so, that by the time she was attending Eastern Illinois State, she was catching the eye of a young actor named John Malkovich, who invited her to come to Chicago and join he and some other actor’s at the Steppenwolf Theatre Company.  Early members of the company already included a young Gary Sinise and a young Laurie Metcalf among others.  In Chicago while with the Steppenwolf Theatre Company, she was a secretary during the days so she could afford to perform at night.

Working her way through the theatre she came to NYC eventually landing on Broadway along side Malkovich in her Tony Award winning role in Lanford Wilson’s “Burn This.”  Then came movie rolls in films such as “Peggy Sue Got Married,” Coppola’s “Tucker,” “Searching For Bobby Fischer,” Oliver Stone’s “Nixon,” and the “The Crucible” along side Daniel Day Lewis.  Later I was happy to see her in other memorable films playing roles such as the wife of John Travolta in John Woo’s “Face/Off,” and the estranged wife of Kevin Kline in “The Ice Storm,” a brilliant movie!   And in recent years “The Contender,” “The Notebook,”  “The Bourne Supremcy,” and “The Upside of Anger.”

Joan Allen seems to do all of this effortlessly.  She transparently transcends into each of these parts, and she is always good.  Actually I should say great!  An actress who’s very recognizable as she’s been seen in so many parts and has had a deservedly successful career; but because of her co-star status, a name not on the tip of everyone’s tongue, and I’m here to say if you love film and good acting, it should be.  An exciting actress of depth and dimension I look forward to seeing her again and again.  She’s like a stamp of approval in my book.  With several movies due out soon, I’m certain we have much more to discover from Joan Allen and luckily we won’t have to wait too long.

When I was young my parents used to send me to a summer camp 3 hours north of Toronto in a town called Haliburton.  As a result of this affiliation I had lots of Canadian friends growing up and some of those friendships continued into adulthood.  For some reason I always liked Canadians and I loved Toronto and it was during one of these trips that I got my first real taste of Henry Moore.  Of course I had studied Moore’s sculptures in art classes and art history, but seeing so many of them and having the sculptures right in front of you is much different than looking at a picture in a book.  His work truly moved me.

The Art Gallery of Ontario houses the largest collection of Henry Moore sculptures in the world with more than 900 of his sculptures and drawings as well as objects that Moore used as inspiration in his sculpture.  It was there that my love affair with Moore began on a deeper level.  His sculptures transfixed me with their shape and form and all those angles and curves.

Henry Moore was the seventh of eight children.  His father was a mining engineer and although the family struggled at times with poverty, education, music, and literature were very important in his family.  His father did not want his son to grow up to be a laborer.  Moore displayed an unusual ability for art at an early age, earning him a scholarship to the “Castleford Secondary School.”  It was during his studies there that Moore made the decision to become an artist.   Serving in WW1 Moore got a grant after the war to continue his education and attended “Leeds College of Art and Design,” where he studied sculpture.

His early sculptures were of a romantic Victorian style including landscapes, modeling animals, and natural forms.  He went on to study primitivism, which affected not only what he was sculpting but his approach as well.  Winning a six-month traveling scholarship Moore went to Northern Italy and there he studied the masters like Michaelangelo and Pisano.  During this time Moore visited Paris to take some classes.  On one of those visits to Paris he went to the Louvre, where he viewed a plaster cast of a Toltec-Maya figure.  It’s said that this had a profound effect on him and his work, and that much of his work after seeing this cast was derived from that place.

Teaching at the Royal College of Art and later heading the sculpture department at the Chelsea School of Art, Moore would make frequent trips to Paris where he was in contact with and influenced by the surrealist movement and the likes of Pablo Picasso, George Braque, Jean Arp and others.  Moore continued to teach until the outbreak of WW11.

Henry Moore was a lucky man.  He was married to a woman named Irina Radetsky, and supposedly had a very happy marriage.  And in 1946 Irina after multiple miscarriages, gave birth to their long awaited daughter, Mary.  He was a very successful artist and got to live and see his art appreciated by the world.  His art also made him a very wealthy man with many large commissions, including the 1950’s sculpture of a reclining woman for the UNESCO building in Paris.

As his wealth and fame grew Moore stayed grounded and decided to continue to live in his original house, a farmhouse they called “Hoglands,” in Hertfordshire, saying it was big enough.  Before his death he established the Henry Moore Foundation where today his legacy is carried out.  The foundation is dedicated to preserving the works of Henry Moore, promoting public appreciation of art, and providing grants for arts education.  And something you might not know about Henry Moore?  In 1951 he was offered Knighthood but turned it down.  He was afraid that people might perceive him as too establishment.

For those of you who live in the NY area, we are in the last two weeks of a special Henry Moore exhibit at the New York Botanical Gardens.  You have through November 2nd to get there if you’re interested.  It’s supposed to be the largest outdoor exhibit of the artists work.

To learn more about the Henry Moore Foundation either click on the link below or cut and paste it into your browser.
http://www.henry-moore-fdn.co.uk/

To get information about the Henry Moore NY Botanical Garden exhibit, either click on the link below or cut and paste it into your browser.
http://www.nybg.org/henry_moore/

It’s creamy and rich and one of my favorite flavors.  Tasting more like ice cream than frozen yogurt this raspberry sorbet swirled with vanilla frozen yogurt is truly a treat.  Even the most hardcore ice cream lovers I know will make an exception or not as big of a face of disapproval when served this dessert.

For me it’s good any time of the year.  It doesn’t have to be summer.  And I actually like it best when it is a little soft.  I think the flavor comes through a bit stronger when it’s not so hard.  So many times I’ll set it out for 20 to 30 minutes before digging in and when I’m less patient I’ll put it in the microwave for 30 seconds.  I know that’s a frightening thought, but a friend of mine showed me this trick for easier scooping and I just applied the theory for my own delight.

I love berries of all kind, but especially raspberries and blackberries.  I also think there is nothing better than great French Vanilla ice cream.  When I lived in the SF Bay Area it used to be Double Rainbow’s French Vanilla, a big Bay Area award winner.  Actually I have to confess to have always been a big ice cream fan.  Years ago I used to go with a friend to our favorite ice cream parlor for double scoop cones every single day for I won’t say how long.  And when I lived in Santa Cruz, California, there used to be Polar Bear ice cream, which was homemade.  The owner of the company knew me so well that when he was trying new concoctions, he would call me up and ask me to be one of his official tasters.  I took that as a very high complement.  Back then I was on a banana ice cream kick and his was so good!

So how can someone who used to be such an ice cream fanatic love a frozen yogurt?  I don’t know all I can say is that I do.  This particular one combines two of my favorite flavors and you’d never know by the taste that it’s low fat.  I don’t eat it for that reason.  I eat it because it tastes really good to me, but I know for some of you that will be a plus and for others a reason to avoid it.  But if you like raspberries and you like good vanilla, try it on my suggestion because the way that they “crack” the two together is perfect and you’ll go yum, yum, yum, and then go to the store and buy another pint!

The weather was beautiful and I played tourist with a friend on Sunday.  A camera was a vital essential to fit the part, so was smiling and being happy.  Actually it’s hard not to smile and feel a sense of happiness and well being when setting out on an adventure on your home turf.

I have been on water taxi’s on Fire Island, shuttling from community to community, but I had never been on a NYC Water Taxi until Sunday afternoon.   It wasn’t until then that I realized I have been missing out on a wonderful little New York treasure.  For just $20 you can buy an unlimited “One Day” pass, which will ferry you to all parts of the city and definitely the tourist hot spots.

We got on at the Chelsea Piers stop on 26th Street and immediately climbed the stairs to the top open deck of the taxi to procure a best view status.  I can’t tell you what fun it was to see NYC and Manhattan from the water.  It’s probably been about 8 years since I’ve done that.  It was also fun spending the afternoon with tourists, feeling their enthusiasm, and honing in on some of their excitement.

Our taxi’s first stop was midtown west by the Intrepid Museum, then it was back to the Chelsea Piers, a stop in the West Village, then further south to the World Financial Center, Battery Park, offering great views of the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island, and finally making it to the tip of the island, the South Street Seaport.  Again they have a schedule of drop offs and pick-ups and you can get on and off to your hearts content.  We decided to stay on board, as our destination was Hunter Point, Long Island City.  From the South Street Seaport along the way we happened to see the NYC Waterfalls, all four of them, got a great view of and went under the Brooklyn Bridge, watched people in Brooklyn Heights dining at the River Café, and continued our way uptown up the East River.  It was awe-inspiring.  I have to say NYC is a magnificent place!

At Hunters Point the Water Taxi company has actually created a little beach with fake palm trees that glisten as you look across the water directly at the United Nations, Tudor City, and a great view of the Chrysler building sitting in the background.  We opted not to go to the “Water Taxi Beach,” but to pay a visit to a nearby restaurant and get king crab instead.  The restaurant we went to was a wonderful discovery for me; my friend had been there one time before.  It’s a restaurant that I now highly recommend, especially if you take this little tour and stop off at the Hunters Point water taxi landing.  Housed in what is left of a 100 year-old building, much of the building years ago was destroyed in a fire, obscurely sits this fabulous restaurant, the “Waterfront Crabhouse,” serving among other dishes fresh crab and crab delights to rival those in Maryland.  From the outside it doesn’t look like much, but when you walk through the door you are greeted with nothing but total and complete character, old photo’s, stuff hanging from the ceilings including an old sled, boxing memorabilia in a wood soaked bar, friendly people and lots of history and stories to match.  We ordered the King Crab served Scampi style with melted butter and also an order of Maryland Crab Cakes.  Both came with salads and side dishes and were delicious.  A real treat!

After our late afternoon lunch, we walked along the Long Island City waterfront.  Like Manhattan it too has seen quite a facelift and its waterfront is quite pleasant and beautiful.  But best of all are the views of Manhattan.  I must say those that live on the other side of the rivers both the East River and the Hudson, truly are the ones with the amazing cityscape views.  Manhattan is really beautiful during the day and especially at night.

On our way home we got to watch the sunset on the city and the river, see the moon rising behind the Brooklyn Bridge, the waterfalls lit at dusk, knowing that as the sun was setting NYC was just awakening and opening its eyes, readying itself to come alive as that is what it does each and every night.

Having taken photo’s of the city like I hadn’t taken in years, a few photo’s of Long Island City’s “cracks in sidewalks,” seeing NYC bleached in sunlight and later covered in red, having a healthy windblown look and sun on my face; yesterday I visited my own town and I was as happy, as happy as if I were on a vacation, which in a sense I was.

To find out more information about the NYC Water Taxi’s and also the “Waterfront Crabhouse,” either click on the links below or cut and paste them into your browser.

http://www.nywatertaxi.com/

http://wfcrabhouse.com/

I think writing about Milton Nascimento yesterday put me in a S.American mood.  Actually I’ve always been drawn to the writings and music of South and Central American countries.  I like the way they put words together.  I like the warmth.  I like the poetry.  I like the passion. And being someone with a pretty vivid imagination I also really enjoy the “magical realism” style that many of those authors tend to use.

Reading Isabel Allende for years now, I’ve read most everything she’s written for adults.  Her first published novel “The House Of The Spirits” remains one of my favorite books and might be one that would accompany me on that deserted isle, if put in that position.  And if you only saw the movie, don’t judge, read the book!  There is no comparison.  It’s a great cast and I had high expectations, but was sorely disappointed by the movie.

The pictures Allende paints of the characters in her novels, both real and imaginative, are always full of color and very painterly with subtle nuances that lift them up, bringing them to life as one continues reading and they hit the page.  Actually along the subject of this style of writing, one time I was taking a walk along the Hudson River with a Argentine girlfriend of mine and I was telling her about some of the Central and South American novelists I liked and why.  My friend having lived through the “disappearance” of friends and family in Argentina did not appreciate some of my reasons.  She did not appreciate anyone who wrote of these experiences using language that sounded in anyway flowery or romantic.  She was passionate about that.  For me it was very interesting because many of these writers, my favorites, who lived through these horrible times in Chile, Argentina, the Dominican Republic, tend to weave bits and pieces of those tales into their stories.  For me as an American, I always appreciated it because it was not my personal experience and I didn’t think of it as flowery.  It gave me a sense of history and context, but for her as a girl having to escape with her family, it was too personal.

For over close to 40 years now, if you count her writings as a young woman, Allende who was born in Peru where her father was the Chilean ambassador, has had a very successful and distinguished international career.  Although her life reads like one of her novels, and some are very biographical, although seemingly blessed, Allende’s life has not always been easy or without tragedy.  Her Uncle (cousin) Salvadore Allende, who was President of Chile, the only communist president ever elected in a democratic election (I believe that is still true), was assassinated in a military coup purportedly staged by the United States which gave Pinochet power, and forced her family to flee Chile.  And years later Allende sadly lost her daughter Paula to illness and writes about it in her book “Paula.”  It’s a very touching and moving story.  But Isabel Allende also came from a family of privilege where the likes of people such as the famous poet Pablo Neruda were family friends.  Neruda encouraged a young Isabel who was working in journalism to give it up and to write novels instead.  He said she had too much imagination for journalism.  It’s funny there is a story of a young Allende working one of her first jobs, which was to translate books from English into Spanish.  I guess Allende of course not with the knowledge of her employers, use to embellish the stories she was translating with her own ideas and writing.  When discovered it was not greatly appreciated and as a result she lost her job.  I believe she probably made the books more interesting as she is such a wonderful storyteller.

I think for me I just stumbled upon her magic.  She is a brilliant magical storyteller, be it  “The House of the Spirits,” “Eva Luna,” “The Infinite Plan,” “Portrait in Sepia,” or her tales of “Zorro,” where she was asked to create the story of “Zorro’s” early life and how he came to be the man and infamous swordsman we all know.  When I read Allende, it’s like she is sitting next to me whispering the words with her expression and Chilean accent into my ear.  I just can’t get enough and it continues like this until I fall asleep then wake up the next morning and start again.  Her storytelling and her magic caste their spell on me and I gladly let them take me prisoner.

It’s hard to write something short about Isabel Allende because her life and personal history just cover too much ground.  But if you are looking for a good book to read, all you have to do is pick any one of hers and my guess is that you’ll probably find yourself like me, mesmerized from start to finish.

If you want to find out more about Isabel Allende below is a direct link to her website.  Either click on the link below or cut and paste it into your browser.

http://www.isabelallende.com/

After writing about Gary Oldman, reading about the connection between he and Kevin Bacon, it seemed like a natural progression to write about Kevin.

I’ve known since I started this blog that eventually I would write about him.  He’s been on my list from the beginning.  He is also one of my favorite actors and I’ve met him and talked with him on numerous occasions as my old business partner was and is the bass player in Kevin and his brother Michael’s band, “The Bacon Brothers.”  So all of you fans out there of which I am one, I can share with you that my experience of Kevin is that he’s a good guy, with close family ties, is approachable for an actor of his status, likeable, charismatic with a dry wit, talented we know, and someone who appeared to me to have his priorities straight at least from my point of view.  Also if you are into the “six degrees of Kevin Bacon” game, by reading this blog you are now that much closer.

Born in Philadelphia into a close-knit family, Kevin is the youngest of the Bacon children.  His mother was an elementary school teacher and his father, whom I met once years ago at one of their gigs, was a well-known highly respected city planner, a super-star in his own right.  Growing up in Philadelphia, Kevin’s early training as an actor came from “The Manning Street.”  With roots solidly placed on the East Coast, it is not surprising that as a teenager when Bacon left home he came to NYC instead of LA entering the “Circle in the Square Theater School” to pursue a career in acting.

Getting his film debut in the fraternity comedy “Animal House,” Bacon over the years has played both the good guy and the bad guy, and the truly scary guy.  He has played the leading man and the strong supporting actor.  At times in his career he has been typecast, but Bacon has taken enough diverse roles and parts both big and small, good, bad, funny, romantic, to break through those barriers, demonstrate longevity, and show himself to be a serious consummate actor with a lot of talent and drive.

With roles in “Diner,” “Footloose,” “He Said, She Said,” to Christopher Guest’s “The Big Picture,” “Tremors,” and “Flatliners;” continuing on with groundbreaking performances in Oliver Stone’s “JFK”, “Apollo 13,” “A Few Good Men,” “The River Wild,” “Murder In The First,” “Sleeper,” and “Hollow Man;” taking us to more current characters in “Mystic River,” “The Woodsman,” and “Where the Truth Lies;” his is and has been a formidable career.  And I’ve only mentioned a handful of the movies he’s been in.  Overall I have a tremendous amount of respect for Kevin and his abilities to transform himself into his characters, and think of him as an actor who has earned the respect of his peers.  He takes risks and I believe they have paid off for him.

Taken from IMDB below are two quotes from Kevin about his career, acting, the choices he’s made and why.  I found them to be very poignant.

“And life has taught me that if I am to have a satisfying career, I have to take three things out of the mix. The first is the size of my part. The second is the size of the budget. And the third is the size of my salary. Once you get rid of those things, your possibilities exponentially explode. You get to work with the directors who matter. You get to make movies like The Woodsman (2004).”

“There’s nothing I won’t play. I won’t draw the line at anything. Worrying about image is for celebrities, not actors.”

Coming to a close, I can’t end this article about Kevin Bacon without also mentioning music and Kevin’s love of it.  I’ve witnessed it first hand.  I remember driving around the city with my old business partner in 1995 listening to their first rehearsal tapes.  His older brother Michael, a great guy and talented musician/composer had a big musical influence on Kevin and in May of 1995 the “Bacon Brothers” played their first official gig backed up by some of New York’s finest studio players.  Since then they have recorded 4 albums, performed live on just about every talk show daytime and night, and are still performing and touring.

Kevin has been married to actress Kyra Sedgwick (The Closer) for 20 years.  They have two children, a son and a daughter both teenagers.

To find out more about the “Bacon Brothers” Band either click on the link below or cut and paste it into your browser.  I’ve also enclosed a short YouTube link where Kevin talks about the band and you can hear short cuts from several of their songs.

http://www.baconbros.com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nJa1yNfMYA

I want to apologize for not posting as regularly these past two weeks, but I have been on a great freelance job for Town & Country magazine and have been working long hours.  I will still be on the job next week as well, but it will have slowed down and I should have more time to come up with fun things to write about that I can share with you.

I hope you enjoyed the several articles and photo’s I did post.  I look forward to seeing you next week,

Best regards,

Audrey

I think the first time I saw Gary Oldman in a movie he was playing Sid Vicious in the movie “Sid and Nancy.”  From the very start he felt like a force to be reckoned with.  His talent was obvious!  Next it was his part as British playwright Joe Orton in “Prick Up Your Ears.”    Soon after that it was “Henry and June,” “JFK,” and Coppola’s “Dracula,” edited by my friend Glen Scantlebury, and the list of wonderful performances just kept growing.  I became a big fan, found him interesting to watch, marveled at the variety of characters he played and wouldn’t want to be friends with many, but always figured that if Gary Oldman was in the film it was probably worth checking out.

Since then I don’t think he’s disappointed me.  Some films I liked better then others, some I didn’t see like “Hannibal,” because I’m not good with scary movies.  I thought he was brilliant as was Kevin Bacon in “Murder in the First,” loved his performance as Beethoven in “Immortal Beloved,” and really liked his character of  “James Gordon” in the “Batman” series.  Actually it was after seeing “The Dark Knight” recently that I started thinking about Oldman again and how much I’ve enjoyed him as an actor over the years.

Gary Oldman doesn’t get a lot of publicity he gets accolades and respect.  He’s what you call an actor’s actor.  Something you might not know is that as a child he was also an accomplished singer and pianist who finally settled on acting instead of music. (I can relate to this because I was always torn between art and music.)  After winning a scholarship and getting a BA in drama from the British drama school Rose Bruford College, Oldman applied to the Royal Academy of Drama and was rejected.  They told him to “go do something else with your life.”  I’m certain they have since regretted their decision.  Oldman has also tried his hand at writing, directing and producing most notably with his award winning film “Nil By Mouth.”

Oldman does his best to do his work and stay out of the spotlight.  He isn’t interested in being famous, he’s interested in being the best actor he can be.  He’s been married three times and has three sons from two of his previous marriages.  He’s had a major problem over the years with substance abuse, but is now clean and sober after rehab and his affiliation with AA.  He was born in London and moved to the states in the early 90’s and currently lives in LA.  It looks like 2009 will be a busy year for the actor as he has 4 movies slated for release.

I got home late from work today.  I’m working a big freelance job now through the first week in October.  I was trying to think about what I wanted to write and it needed to be somewhat simple as I was complex all day and what came to me tonight was pet insurance and what a good tip it is and what a lifesaver it has been for me this past year.

I got pet insurance for the first time 3 years ago when I got my cat Suki.  I realized that I had never had a pet and at some point in their life not spent at least $2,500.00 on them for some sort of veterinary care.  I decided that over the course of my pets life at around $22 a month I would spend quite a bit too, but coming up with that small amount each month would be less taxing then having to come up with a large sum all at once.  So I got insurance for Suki and my older cat Yoshi too.

Well Yoshi got very sick this past winter.  She became diabetic and developed IBS.  Yes that’s right, cats can get IBS.  Anyway it has seemed to be one thing after another for months on end now and her meds alone are very costly.  Truthfully I don’t know what I would have done without it or what Yoshi would have done.  I’m embarrassed to say the amount of vet bills I’ve racked up, but I didn’t know what else to do.  She was never at death’s door or close enough to it to not justify helping her and taking care of her.  Besides I love her.  But I have to say loving her with pet insurance is a lot easier then trying to love her without it.  The treatments she’s had would have been prohibitive without the help of this plan.

So my “crack” for today, if you have a pet and dearly love your pet, highly consider looking into it.  I use Petcare Insurance and they’ve been great.  They have several plans you can choose from.  If you’re interested go to www.petcareinsurance.com.  If your pet gets sick they may not thank you, but you will thank me.

On 9/11 seven years ago I thought I was going to take the 1/9 train to the World Trade Center as I had the day before, get out of the train and walk several blocks east to the court house where I had started jury duty the previous day.  I had been chosen as a prospective juror in a grand larceny case and unlike the day before the judge had told us to reconvene at 10am instead of  9am as the lawyers and he had some things to discuss about the case.  I was just about to run out my door that morning when I got a call from a friend who was hysterical saying, “you’re not going to believe this but a plane just flew into the World Trade Center.”  At that point I thought maybe I should call the courthouse?  When I called the courthouse I actually got through as no one at that point had realized what was happening or about to happen.  They said in lieu of all the commotion downtown that jury duty was cancelled for the day and I should show up tomorrow as scheduled.  Little did we know!

Soon it became evident that this wasn’t one misguided pilot and a horrible accident.  At that point I decided, why watch the news to see what is happening, I should just go up to the roof of my apartment building where I would have a direct view of the World Trade Center buildings.  I wasn’t the only one to have the idea.  There were probably about 40 of us up there, each horrified in our own way.  Up on the roof we watched in shock at what seemed so unreal.  I don’t know why I didn’t think of my friend Karol at that exact moment.  I guess there was too much going on to think straight.  We listened to someone’s radio, heard about the Pentagon, some people had gone and gotten their binoculars which were passed around, and others got their cameras, but all of us stood in disbelief trying to console the persons to the right and left of us.   We knew there was going to be a high death toll, maybe even a hundred or two?   I also sadly knew that this meant war, that I was witnessing my generations Pearl Harbor.

As the flames got higher and the situation graver, people were saying things like, “it was built to withstand a 727 jet.”   They talked about the structure of the building and how well it was built trying to reassure the people watching and themselves.  Then the unthinkable happened, a building collapsed like it was a toy.  The magnitude of the experience was just too great!  The cloud of smoke and dust was like something I had never seen before.  I just shook and stared in utter fear waiting for the building to reappear.  It was unthinkable, impossible that it was gone.  It was unfathomable to think of all who must have perished.  Around me people were screaming and shaking, falling to the ground, trying to steady themselves.  Then we all nervously stood and watched the second building and prayed.  At this point I have no doubt I was in a state of shock and so were those around me.

Soon thereafter the second building collapsed too.  I cannot explain to you the profound sadness that swept over my body.  To this day all I have to do is think about those buildings and it is a physical experience.  It is something that lives deep inside me and at the time I didn’t know if I could ever feel a sense of normalcy again.  People stayed on the roof crying, hugging, feeling lost, not knowing what to do next.  What do you do?  Eventually I went back to my apartment and woke up a close friend in California.  I was talking and speechless at the same time.  Then I tried getting through to my family that lives here and elsewhere.  Everyone had known that I was on jury duty and thought that I was down there.  I needed to assure them I was not.

My girlfriend Karol was missing and all her friends were looking for her, but it seemed that people everywhere were looking for someone.  Makeshift memorials started to appear randomly throughout the streets with photo’s, flowers, and candles.  I stood in line at the armory with about 1500 others waiting to file a missing persons report.  Two of Karol’s other girlfriends had gone to her apartment to get a toothbrush, some hairs, anything that could prove DNA while I waited in line, which we knew would take hours.  Volunteers with water, sandwiches and snacks came and offered whatever they had just needing to feel that they were doing something.  People walked around the city dazed, few worked.

In different parts of the city groups started to gather, it just happened.  People needed to be with other people.  They needed someone to mourn with.  At Union Square, close to me, thousands started to gather at night, pictures of loved ones, memorabilia and candles filled the park, music, guitars, and groups singing filled the air and we all waited and hoped and started to come to terms with our losses, but we needed to do it together.  By this time my friends and I were beginning to accept that our friend was dead, after all she worked on the 89th floor and we knew she was there when the plane entered her building on the 82nd floor.

It’s hard to believe that seven years have passed.  Those initial months after 9/11, I lived in its aftermath.  I breathed bad air, smelled its stench when the wind would blow in a certain direction, counted the days it took for the clouds to disappear where the buildings once stood.  I heard emergency sirens throughout the night for months on end, didn’t sleep a good nights sleep until maybe January, and tried to remember what normalcy was but couldn’t find it.  I also knew that what had been normal would change and normalcy would never be what it once was so I would have to find a new normal, a new place to land.

My girlfriend Karol did die.  She was in the second tower to get hit but the first to go down.  She was on the phone with her mother when the plane entered the building.  She had called her mother to tell her something was going on at the WTC, but not to worry, she was ok.

Funny, beautiful, smart, kind hearted; a person full of life; Karol is missed everyday by those who knew her and loved her and she is especially missed today.

Peace.